Goodbye!

My parents have discovered my blog. So, 'til I make a new one, it's goodbye. It simply can't be a personal online journal to me with my knowing that my parents can read my entries.

One, I can't be completely honest coz I can't curse if I when I'm angry, complain when I'm annoyed, mope when I'm sad or lonely or depressed. Especially if it's because of them that I feel that way. Don't get me wrong though, my parents and I get along great. But hey, it happens.

Two, it's embarassing. That's pretty much self-explanatory. Can't talk about the women in my life openly knowing that my mom can tease about it anytime. Can't talk about accidents and other embarassing episodes. Can't... Well, there's plenty.

Three, some secrets are meant to be known. But I'd rather if my parents never learned mine. It gives me a deep sense of security knowing that I can't possibly get in trouble for something nobody was supposed to know in the first place. Plus, I like keeping secrets. It's a form of celebrating the soul's honesty--for in keeping secrets, you realize the wrong that your mind is capable of and discover a conscience that shames of it; you revel in the mischief of knowing something nobody else knows; and you come face to face with the truth and get a one-on-one lecture on how the truth can affect a change that you could either want or avoid, but (you know) is gonna happen anyway sooner or later in your life. It's torture. But it's a good kind of torture because you get to think about things before actually letting them take effect in your everyday life. So, I guess that's how my life's gonna be for a while--a secret. To my friends, ciao for now. You know where to contact me. And to those who don't, just send me an email by clicking the link on the sidebar.

Goodbye :)

What I Need Is What I Can't Reach

taken from postsecret.blogspot.com

The Past Month & A Half

I've been so friggin depressed. I feel like I'm getting older. There's this whole burden resting on my nape and I feel like my neck is gonna give way. The weight of the world is resting on me and I'm beginning to tire. I feel like I'm at a point in my young life wherein I am not in any position to help myself. And so I dedicate my mind and strength to achieving bigger things. But can't help but feel all this doesn't mean a thing.

Kahapon

I used to pride myself in having an abnormally patient temper. I almost got into two fights yesterday for the most petty things. So I guess I don't anymore. It was so bad I had to do origami to calm me down. ORIGAMI! For goodness sake...ORIGAMI! Putangina. Bahala na.

I lost my license

I lost my license. Been driving to school and back and all over the Metro for three days now without it. I'm such a dumbass. Naha-hassle tuloy ako. I've come to realize that losing a license is worse than losing a cell phone. I've lost my cell phone twice and both times I felt I was disconnected from the rest of civilization. I still feel part of the world now, but I feel like the world doesn't like me very much. I'm always afraid of getting caught on the highway or of getting bumped or bumping someone coz if I do, I'd get arrested. Putangina. I've gotta get a new one FAST.

Tao Lamang

Life is a ride. This is the tenth week of school and the workload is becoming increasingly heavy by the day. Moreover, my personal life hasn't been its best. It's frustrating that picking between certain aspects of my life has been a constant chore due to the fact that it has to be one or the other with most things. I want a life, but I remain undecided because I am burdened by the task of choosing which area I would want to prioritize. I am divided by my responsibilities as a student as well as by my constant desire to remain afloat. I need a buoyant structure for I am seaweed with no driftwood; a barnacle with no ship to cling on to. I remain steadfast in my faith in God, yet I remain handicap because I play in "life-pusoy dos"; meaning, God deals the cards, but it remains my responsibility to play them at my best. As the saying goes: "Nasa Diyos ang awa, nasa tao ang gawa." Paano na kung hindi ko na kayang gumalaw? Kapag wala na akong magawa kundi kumapit?

Waking Life

I've got too many personal philosphies it's almost impossible to pinpoint the contradictions.

I want a moustache. But I shave my face everyday.

The country is in shambles because politicians have grown so fond and accustomed to lying. Apparently, so have I.

I want to have a deeper sense of faith, but I can't because I've become too busy to learn about my God.

I hate Sky Cable because they jumbled up the channel sequence, but I love it because they brought back UFC on Solar.

"To do is to be." --Descartes
"To be is to do." --Voltaire
"Do be do be do." --Frank Sinatra